1. Shazam for clothes.
When you see someone out with a cute bag/dress/pair of boots and you Just Have To Have It, open this nifty app, point your phone camera at the item in question, and it will find out where it’s from AND give you a link to buy.
2. A bedhead with built-in coffee maker.
And a self-dispensing drawer for all your coffee pods. Press a button and, bam, latte in bed. In fact, can we just make it dispense the caffeine straight into our mouths while we’re still lying down? Yeah, that.
3. A dog translator.
Attach it to Rex’s collar and you’ll know all of his secret little doggy dreams, hopes and wishes. Woof.
4. An app that chooses your look each day.
Anyone else sick of deciding what to wear every morning? An app that logs every item in your wardrobe, then syncs with the weather app each day to put together the perfect outfit would be heaven. Plus, extra sleep-in time.
5. Blowout-proof thongs.
It’s summer. You’re walking to the corner store. The concrete’s hotter than Zac Efron’s naked body. And the little round bit that hold the upper part of your Havianas to the sole suddenly pops off, leaving you to face the scorching ground one-footed. Imagine a world where this never happened...
6. A mirror that tells you how you look.
“Daaaaaym, girl, you’re bangin’ in that dress! Are you going to wear the cage heels? That would look friggin’ amazing.” And if it’s not your best look, this mirror will tell you straight – but, you know, be nice about it. It doesn’t want to hurt your feelings.
7. Winged eyeliner machine
It’s really freakin’ hard to get winged liner perfect, and even if you nail the shit out of one eye, you’ll inevitably screw up the other one. So a liner that applies itself would be out-of-this-world handy. Let’s add settings to control the length of the flick, too: zero, kitten, and ’50s vixen.
8. Pizza that makes you lose weight. And goes to the gym for you.
Well, if we’re gonna make ridiculous things exist, we’re gonna go all out... Give us All Of The Pizza, kthanksbye.